Wednesday, May 19, 2010

born with the thighs of a racist pig.


a few months ago, my friend L and i set off for our usual afternoon date with the chat walla of punjab sweet house at pali naka. we’d just finished up with a project that kept us swotting for weeks on end and this was our first free afternoon. the plan was to get chat for lunch, then head out for some street shopping along hill road, drop into the mango sale at linking road, come back for a nice cup of tea at office, and then head out again with our cameras to catch the sun set at carter road. or whatever else.

L and i were in high spirits as we bowled merrily along in the rickshaw. it was the kind of day that began with no agenda and promised to get better with every passing hour.

then we turned a corner and spotted the gaggle of skinny white bitches traipsing along the sunny lanes of pali hill.

now bandra is a pretty neighbourhood on any given day, and it has its share of beauties and celebrities. but these chicks had the kind of heart stopping goddess-ness that could make you quit breathing altogether. 


they were, without exception, tall and delicious and creamy as frosty glasses of cold coffee. and without exception, they wore breezy little blousons and hot little pants.


and their legs, ohhhh! their legs were so leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeean and so loooooooooooooooooooooong. each and every pair of them. all calf muscles and dainty hips and tapering thighs.

L and i didn’t stand a chance as our rickshaw rattled over the pot holes that murphy had so thoughtfully lined that particular stretch of road with. 


glumly, we surveyed our own thunderous south indian thighs as they shimmied and shook and jiggled gloriously, keeping tempo. they were, without doubt, 100% cellulite.


ufff, what’s with the ex pat infestation! - L muttered bitterly when she finally caught her breath - why don’t they just walk back to where they came from with those perfect legs of theirs!

GAH! yeah, bloody GO HOME, bloody BITCHES! - i spat back.

yup, i meant it and so did L.


image source: www.loona.net

14 comments:

blunt edges said...

buhahahaha...n thus its proved that women everywhere think the same way!!! :D

mentalie said...

@blunt, do you mean to say all women are racist pigs? careful how you answer, amigo...:D

Shanu said...

LOL...Those r xctly my sentiments when I see those gora gals flaunting their well toned tummies and legs ;)

soin said...

the ladies with great legs,rare them. the only reason mrs.beckham is fvrt=the legs.free

Product Junkie said...

When i think south Indian thighs, i think Ramba.hahahahah

Of late what has been pissing me of is skinny girls in the gym. Especially when they sympathetically smile at you while in the middle of your millionth reverse crunch. Grrrrrr

eye-in-sty-in said...

with that scrumptous description of leggggssss, you just upped the value of a tall, frothy, creamy latte!

Here's a thought to cheer you up - not everyone likes a skinny bony piece of chick(en) leg :D

R said...

I care for your sentiment but all I can think of when you talk of legs is Emmanuelle Chriqui. *drool*

As for these girls, legs are pretty much all they've got. Let them be. :D

Atrisa said...

Ugh don't get me started! #IndianNod

mentalie said...

@shanu, oink!

@soin, as always, your honesty takes my breath away :)

@product, yup. my right thigh is called rumbha in fact. the left one's called wumbha. they send you their regards.

@eye, i like you, you say all the right things.

@R, emmanuelle has such a pretty head too. and here's some perspective - it's not that legs are all they have; it's that they have all that leg, dammit!

@atrisa, no, no, please tell me!

Choco said...

Ummm..Why am I left with a delish mental picture of them now? Why do I feel that they look delish??

Ugh..*Get out! Get out!*..(smacks head) :|

Anonymous said...

and what about the super fit firangs who do 50 laps in the pool without breaking a sweat!and then casually do another 15 miles of jogging to even it out!

Eveline said...

Don't go changin' to try to please me.... I like you just the way you are..... :P

Feeling insecure are you??? Geez...get over it! You know you're awesome! And you (like, um, fat thighs) rock.

ani_aset said...

hehe :)brilliant this one haha

Cynic in Wonderland said...

And have you seen that Atul Kasbekar ad? Sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

last word by the acp

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